Tuesday, December 09, 2008

12. 別人的羈絆

這幾天發生了很多事,使我難以成眠。

獨坐在窗外細想,何解我竟一次又一次成了別人的羈絆?

馬尾女孩那夜跟我把酒,問我能否說清楚我和她的關係。之後,她旋即與一位商場俊傑展開了戀情。大抵,她先前是怕我會為她愁煩而先下手為強。

那天我請心兒吃了一頓山頂料理,席間,我倆,和平,分手。過往雙方共同擁有的一切,各取所需,又或你送我贈的所有,各自留念,又或你虧我欠的全部,都不用本利歸還,哀樂自決。其實也不是完全自決,說自決,此刻,有點那個。我相信,時間和精力還是學習「放手」的必要代價。

兩位阿姐級人馬自海外分公司來港考察,義務接待兼打發悶氣的我,帶了他們往煙花之地購物兼吃喝。過後順道送她們回 International House,順道跟 Saka 說再見,順道送 Meiji 回房,順道坐在床邊閒談公私事,順道喝了半瓶果汁,順道不留痕跡的離開。

這些絆倒別人的日子活得輕描淡寫,沒有多少哀怨,也沒有多少歡樂。只因我也作了繭,整天都在惦念著一個人。

那天起,我開始默默的,寫那《簡史》,想起那首歌

16 comments:

篤篤篤撐 said...

Linda Ronstadt 呀, 你o甘都記起佢 ?

佚名 said...

c.m:
非單戀日誌咁簡單
都係多戀多d
點解咁多順道既?

Hana said...

我不寫又怎顯得你寫的好?!

(啍!一於同你斗...斗多... 文)

HollyCow said...

It is so painful to say goodbye. Just say goodbye to someone last night. Internet lover!! I can't sleep either.
我不知道有多少人与我一樣,上網一打入ID與密碼之後,就開始重新獨自飛行。許多時候,想像,比真實更動人。特別是在軟弱多情時分,由其工作壓力之餘,思念親人,脱離了自我,更能勇敢說出溫柔甜言蜜语。會不會選擇脱離现實?不!緣分最終是一個美夢卻壓抑著的句号。

HollyCow said...

CM: By the way, if no objection, will add you on my Blog. Which I never did.

火鶴 said...

EEEEE!!!!!

你又post呢首歌!!!

微豆 Haricot said...

C.M.

I read all twelve of your 單戀日誌 articles, which you started on Oct 14th. Man, you are on an emotional roller-coaster and you sound desperate !!! Splitting up is never easy for anyone and I feel for you brother. My only advice for you is: Don’t jump from the frying pan into the fire. It’s better to learn how to tread water (on your own, in the deep end) than trying to grab someone near you as a life saver or as an emotional substitute. Of course, you know the situation the best and I am just speculating here on the side-line (恕我直言了)。

Karen (Sze) said...

個故事仲--未--完?

xiao zhu said...

獨「坐」在窗「外」?

小寶 said...

>獨「坐」在窗「外」?

嗯...
被人先下手為強
然後又被迫和平分手
可以坐在床邊閒談公私事
竟然都冇下文
難怪佢準備跳樓殉情
:p

HollyCow said...

微豆 Haricot:
你要知感情緣份到了,放出了就收不回。我這幾个月清楚得刻骨铭心。

C.M. said...

篤撐兄:
簡直纏繞我一生。

小佚:
多d順道,多d可能嘛。

冰冰:
你一日起碼兩篇,文筆又咁好,我搭飛機都追唔上喇。(呢排煩到想死呀我)

Holly:
It's sad for what had passed, but it's sweet for what you had gone through. 既然緣分可起可滅可再起,那應該是一連串的頓號...

鶴兄:
咿... 鬼知我會咁快破戒咩...

Haricot:
Thanks and you are so understanding. My brain is now so spongy that I look like a zombie. I'll keep my fingers crossed.

Karen:
未完。唔通你認為上次已經完左?

小珠:
係播。應該改為:危坐在窗前,播。

小寶:
我叻,曉得拆曬d窗花。

佚名 said...

c.m:
多d順道,多d可能嘛。
-->咁樣順道法,有d得人驚

小寶 said...

今日路過睇下你有冇交功課既時候
見到你上一篇原來係「窗外」
唸起你呢一篇又比miss豬捉你坐在窗「外」
突然唸起吳宗憲+馮瑋君呢首幾好聽既「窗外」
我唸都幾o岩你聽既
就送首窗外比你喇
http://hk.youtube.com/watch?v=KdxkQDUrfSw&feature=related

C.M. said...

小佚:
哈,你都覺得得人驚咧... 所以若果有個男仔話順道送你返屋企...

小寶:
多謝曬。原來坐響窗外面,都幾... 凍。

佚名 said...

c.m:
咁要小心d啦
好得人驚架